For the uninitiated krumping is a hyperkinetic and confrontational dance form that originated in the African-American ghettoes of Los Angeles. Two years ago I was invited to an advance screening of Rize, a much hyped documentary about krumping. The movie was an absolute load of rubbish and the dancing in the movie was so ridiculous that I left the theatre thinking that Rize was in fact a mockumentary and that David LaChappelle was attempting to play an elaborate prank on the world, much like Orson Welles had with The War of the Worlds. How wrong was I? Krumping is real and has taken the world by storm, including New Zealand, and is fast becoming the biggest dance craze in history since the river dance. One of the pioneers of the art form (if you can call it that), Tommy the clown, is currently touring schools in New Zealand performing and educating the youth about drugs, gangs and academic achievement.

Maybe I’m a hater, or maybe I’m out of touch (read: old school), or maybe I’m an idiot for basing my opinion of this dance form on one poorly made doco and a Madonna music video – I just don’t get krumping! But kids enjoy krumping so who am I to judge anyway? With all the bad shit going on these days, two year olds being shot dead and what not, not to mention New Zealand’s officially recognised poor performance in child well-being, kids are in need of some positive rolemodels in their lives, if it happens to be some guy dressed up as a clown so be it. I’m still sore from Robert D. Frogg piking out on his appearance at Beachhaven Primary School all those years ago.

If you’re in front of your TV right now switch to TV2, Sport and Recreation Minister Trevor Mallard is on Studio 2 and about to get his krump on. For those of you still in bed right now, here’s something I prepared earlier – a video of Mallard and his boy, Health Minister Pete Hodgson, krumping their hearts out. Who said white people can’t dance? Actually they might have a valid point.

*please note – I’m Rick James bitch!!!

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New T.I ‘Big things poppin’ video. I’m as big a T.I fan as anyone, but *smh @ that chorus. Once I hear it a couple more hundred times I’ll probably be chantin it along with everyone else tho….. yup.

On a sidenote, Amy Winehouse is getting all the good looks in the U.S at the moment. Rehab remix with Hov Amy Winehouse feat Jay Z – Rehab remix

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“After 50 Cent, [hip-hop fans] was looking for something non-confrontational, and they went after first thing that came along. That was Kanye West, and his record took off.”

Old comment, but appropriate today being that 50′s new video dropped and so has Kanye’s new single. Check ..

50 Cent – Amusement Park

New Kanye
Kanye West - Can't tell me nothin


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I’m no royal watcher but it is obvious to me that the UK’s royal family are no longer relevant in the modern world outside of women’s gossip magazines – it would seem to me that their days of bludging from the UK public are numbered. So the decision to cancel Prince Harry’s deployment in Iraq, because it is deemed too risky, defies logic to me. Opinions on the validity of the war in Iraq aside, would you agree that sending one of their son’s to fight for their people and him returning in a body bag would be great PR for the royal family?

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After months of fire-imposed closure K’ Road’s Rising Sun will be opening again very soon! To kick it off they are holding the “Rising Sun Winter BBQ” with a huge line up and BBQ’d sausages… yes, you did hear that right, Rising Sun will be taking the meaning of sausage party to dizzying new heights. It’s a Base FM gig so no doubt there’s gonna be a lot of dudes there, but they’re really emphasising it by serving sausages too. Are they subliminally marketing this as a male-only gig? A word of caution hetero males, if some guy on the dancefloor offers you sausage make sure you ask for no cheese, if you know what I mean.

Jokes aside though, it’s a pretty heavy lineup starting with international guest DJ Mr. Thing from the UK. Mr Thing was once a member of the UK’s legendary Scratch Perverts crew and was placed third in the DMC World Champs in 2000 (I think), he also worked with DJ Premier on the BBE compilation ‘Kings Of Hip Hop’ (read: this motherfucker has deep crates!). Also on the bill are local rappers 4Corners, hosts Ladi 6 and Parks, our boys D-Fizzle and Truent, Base FM DJs Manuel Bundy, Sgt Benji and SP23 as well as live graffiti art demonstrations by world champions TMD. It’s basically a miniature “conscious” hip hop summit, all we need now is the 5th element, crime.

If this gig tickles you in your special place you can find more info here.

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A-Trak is famous these days for being Kanye West’s DJ but before all of that he was a star in his own right. He’s a world champion DJ several times over, not to mention being the youngest world champ ever – a talented young man without a doubt. Our man Sam Wicks caught up with young ‘Trizzak to discuss scratching and DJing for a feature on Radio New Zealand. A-Trak even drops a few subliminals towards so-called “turntablists”, oooh DJ beef, exciting stuff…A-Trak ‘Music 101′ by Sam Wicks

Shout ups to Atsushi for the photo

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So some dirty old man brings a hoe home and then murders the hoe with a hoe. Confused? Well click here for one of the most ridiculous news headlines ever, I bet it was high fives around the office when the writer came up with it.SMH @ us finding humour in the murder of a fellow human being. Spare a thought for his/her soul…

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Meeting Jonah Lomu when I was 12 at the after match function for the first Super 12 game in Palmy remains the only time Ive been truely star-struck. I even saw him last year at Burger Fuel and was shook, like I was still rockin’ a baldy with the fringe. So as I watched the highlights of the All Blacks Classics vs Japan last night, I was amped to see a break away run from the man himself. Though watching a 32 year old Jonah getting chased down by a japanese back was similar to seeing Michael Jordan miss an open dunk in the all-star game, it still brought back memories of 95′ when Lomu pummeled England in the World Cup Semi. Jonah in that particular game is still my favourite individual sporting performance of all-time. My gran taped all the games during that World Cup and I would watch that shit everytime I went around for about two years. I remember in a later interview Jonah said that though he was hyped for the game, it was when Tony Underwood giggled and winked at him during the haka that he was ready to smash sumthin. Mike Cat should of slapped Underwood after.

Lomu is like a Mike Tyson or Vince Carter. Their individual ability was revolutionary to their respective sports. And whether its injury (Lomu) non-sports related incidents (Tyson) or lack of accomplishment (Carter) that has tarnished their legacy to the sports geeks, their highlights alone are still more endearing to our generation than Johnny Wilkinson’s drop-kick world cup win, Lennox Lewis’ defensive-jab victory streak, or Tim Duncan’s bank-shot dynasty. Not even hating.

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Ja Rule is back, and he’s brought New York with him in the form of perpetual underachievers Fat Joe and Jadakiss. I appreciated the glimmer of hope Ja created for his career on ‘New York, New York’ with these 2. I also liked ‘Caught up’ , with about 3 other people i know of. Cool and Dre come back for this, and Im a sucker for triumphant synths so I’m feeling it. Khaled feat Ja Rule, Jada, Fat Joe – New York is back

p.s mp3 has some wack audio tags in it but its the only one i could find.

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So I just noticed yesterday that the tagline for the Sunday News is “Keeping it real,” that shit cracked me up, I could picture the writers busting rap poses with their arms in awkward positions.

Sunday Star Times ain’t “keeping it real” like Sunday News, their headline yesterday read something along the lines of “Girl 7, in gangland shooting.” The headline implied that this shooting incident was gang related when in fact it wasn’t, the accident took place in Maraenui which has a “gang element” and apparently makes it a “gangland shooting,” even though this incident had absolutely nothing to do with gangs. It was more a case of an absent-minded, and possibly stupid, father letting off shots from his airgun and catching his poor daughter in the neck. Let’s hope she gets well.

Given the unfortunate death of Jhia Te Tua last week the topic of gangs in New Zealand has been a pretty hot debate, I guess Sunday Star Times was scraping the barrel to find something gang-related to take advantage of this. There have been suggestions of banning gangs in New Zealand, I’m not so sure that you can ban gangs, they are the symptom of a much deeper problem. My suggestion is how ’bout you take that P out your pipe… nah seriously, take that shit out!

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